tears of all sorts

So first off the ladies that I complained about last night left a good tip (20+%) and they had finished their dessert by the time I finished my post.

So the sad to me news (with all kinds of mixed feelings) is I only have one more serving shift. I know I mentioned that I would be done and I don't guess it really hit me at that point. Last night while I was working the manager told me that after the next shift (next Thursday) it'll be my last and I won't be on the schedule anymore. I expected it, but a few minutes later I was WAY BUMMED (esp. since it seems like everyone stopped to ask me about it, the majority of them already knew, they just didn't think about it with their own busy lives and all). So in my moment of sadness I told the manager that I would still be willing to fill in as a Hostess or Expo if needed as long as they called a day in advance so I could bring extra clothes to my day job (the owner always calls the day of and asks me to work, I NEVER CAN, no clothes (not enough time to drive home, change, drive to the restaurant, and still work)). So I told my husband about it and he was okay and understood. I'm not that great at saying goodbye. I've worked there for five years. It was one of my two first jobs when I moved here and I started two days after moving and been there ever since.

Well those are the tears of sadness, but today I find out this chick (that I love, she's great) gets a "promotion" and she's only been there about a year or so! Ever since I started working the restaurant I've always wanted to work in the bar or be a cocktail server (they make way hella more money than a normal server). Every time I've asked they told me I couldn't make it to work early enough (gotta be there by four and I don't get off my day job until five) or couldn't "handle" doing it by myself on the few days I could (Mondays and Saturdays usually just have one CS). But of course my friend gets scheduled "accidentally" to do it on a Saturday night! I asked about it and how come I've still never been able to after five years of working there? The manager's response is "well I've got to try her and test her to see if she is able to or not". What about me? I never got "tested"! I know I don't suck I've gotten WAY TOO MANY COMPLIMENTS and very very few complaints (kinda funny how similar those two words look, huh). I know why deep down inside: b/c I'm not a b!t(h, she isn't either, but she isn't a sweet push over the way I am. I'll be the first to admit: I don't like to rock the boat. I take what I'm given and be grateful for it and do it to the best of my ability. Also she has had some experience as a bar tender at other places, and I haven't.

So when she told me I was a bit peeved and thought "to hell with them, I'm not going to be an on call person, f them, that makes me so pissed I'll just be done, they screwed themselves over". But I know that I'll take em' up on the offer if they call just because I enjoy working there overall and love the people. But I know if I show up and she is CS instead of on the floor I'll get angry all over again with jealousy.

Then there's "tears" (no really, just emotions) about one of my other friends at the restaurant loosing her job. I'm sure it's for a good reason and it's not like I'm going to see her again since I don't work there, but it's sad. She's been there awhile and has an important role. I'm sure you're wondering "if they are friends won't she see her outside of work"? Well it's kinda hard, she's a mom of two, they don't live close, and we run in different circles. We've talked about having a girls night once a month, but we'll see.

More positive "tears"..... This morning when I arrived to school one of my parents asked me to watch their kids in the near future. So at least I know that I'll still be having some sort of extra income until my husband starts making the big bucks.

Mixed emotion "tears".... I had a friend back last fall that I haven't been able to get in touch with and continue to try. A few weeks ago I sent her a message just to see if she's okay or not. I never heard anything from her. Well last night, for some strange unknowing reason why, I had the strangest feeling/inkling to call her and check on her (mind you we haven't spoken in almost seven months) and I did. I left a really nice message without any "negative" words or comments. I called her last night on my way home around 9:30 or so. I wonder if she'll call me back. I guess if not I should take it as the end and say goodbye, but once again I'm not good at that. Especially when I think true friends are a virtue and a blessing to have around b/c they'll stick by your side no matter what, even if it takes a bit of time to know and understand whats going on.

Hope today is better

Good day